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“Nationals October 2019

OPINION: Pittman’s Political Science

| August 05, 2020, 01:00 PM

Rams Head

I’m County Exec Stu Pittman, forget real science

My political science is where I put my reliance

It may not make sense, it may even be stupid, man

But you better obey because I’m Stu Pittman.

 

Covid Death rates are low, hospitalizations are too

But my political science dictates fear and restrictions anew

So even with an infection rate below five per cent

I’ve got more Covid orders, I’ll never relent

 

My political science says Covid comes out after ten,

So, bars must stop serving alcohol then!

Food after ten is ok, this isn’t about protecting people

It’s really about training them to obey me like sheeple.

 

A casino serving liquor? Well, that’s all right

Covid doesn’t care if you drink there all night

A bar is really different. It makes perfect sense, man

Says the political science of Dr. Nilesh Kalyanaraman

 

I fine businesses confused by rules that change every day

I’m running the show, they better do what I say

CDC and Pediatricians say reopening classrooms is safe and ok

My political scientists at the teachers’ union refuse-so I say no way!

 

Progressives love dictating to everyone else, you see

I love making rules for you, that don’t apply to me

I go to big protests; my political science says Covid’s not there

it’s in churches, schools, and bars- so you better beware!

 

I only listen to experts if they agree with me,

So Chief Altomare you will no longer see.

Forget Altomare’s record, my political science says racism’s systemic

Effectively protecting everyone is just an old fashioned gimmick

 

My political science is great for progressives,

It’s an excuse that justifies all our excesses!

We’ll dismantle the economy, education, and the police, too

While we pretend it’s all about protecting you!

Herb McMillan, an airline captain, served on the Annapolis City Council for one term and in the Maryland House of Delegates for 12 years. He may be reached at [email protected]

Rams Head

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