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“Nationals October 2019


| May 10, 2010, 02:19 PM | 0 Comments

Kids. They’re great. I don’t have any myself but after teaching, coaching, and babysitting, I’m ready to give them back after my allotted time. Sure when I have my own it will probably be different, but cleaning up after kids in the restaurant makes me realize that my OCD could never handle it on a regular basis.

I have worked in several kid friendly restaurants, and being the bubbly server that I am, I always got assigned to the kid tables. Parents love my jovial table manner and I rarely show my disdain when I’m asked twelve times for ketchup and chocolate milk. Fortunately, since I’m currently working in an ethnic restaurant, we don’t get much traffic from the little buggers. Every now and again, I’m reminded of how much I used to hate waiting on a table full of kids. It’s generally not even the kids that bother me, it’s the parents.

Parents: our restaurant is not a playground, so please keep your children from treating it like one. Jumping on chairs, running around the tables and screaming is not acceptable restaurant behavior. If your child has an affinity for tearing up paper napkins or Splenda packets, remove them from their sight and do not continually ask me for more. Last time I checked, my table was not a blank canvas–if you want one of those, go to Macaroni Grill! So please keep your child from using it as one. I swear, we could pass out crayons and coloring books and be left with a Sharpie masterpiece lovingly drawn everywhere except between the lines. Amazing.

All that aside, if your children are well-behaved and don’t leave my section looking like a natural disaster, then please, by all means, come back and see us anytime. If you realize that your children have made a mess and you actively attempt to clean it up while you profusely apologize, you know what? I probably won’t talk about you when you leave. However, if you are well aware that your table has been declared a State of Emergency, your little darlings seem to have missed their last dose of Adderall, and you’re on your fourth cocktail and it’s only 11:30 a.m., I probably will avoid your table until you’re ready to leave because typically I’d be lucky to get 10% from you.

My advice to you, if you leave a mess beyond the normal scope of what’s acceptable, do your best to clean it up yourself OR over-tip your sever.

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About the Author - The Bar Bitch

I graduated with an Art degree from a small liberal arts college, did a bit of traveling and moved to Annapolis from Baltimore about seven years ago. I currently manage a well-known Annapolis restaurant, serve and bartend. I live downtown and I like sunsets and long walks on the beach :)

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