April 22, 2024
Annapolis, US 43 F

Maryland’s State Song Update

Courtesy: Washington Post
Courtesy: Washington Post

Finally, someone has some sense. Too bad it isn’t anyone in our State Government. As we mentioned about a month ago, one of the most pressing items on the legislative agenda this session was the “offensiveness” of the Official Maryland State Song.  The older less politically correct version was laced with profanity including rhe word “huzza” and utilized the cringe inspiring term “despot’s heel”.  I guess it is a good thing Dick Cheney and Patrick Leahy are not Maryland legislators–I imagine Pam Beidle (the bill’s sponsor) might have had a stoke.

But, kudos go to a satirist who really knows how to put it all in perspective. I tip my hat to Gene Weingarten from the Washington Post:

We sing to thee, our fav’rite state
Maryland, my Maryland
You joined the North, tho’ pretty late,
Maryland, my Maryland

Your morals were a bit unkempt
Your ethics were beneath contempt,
When slaves were freed, you stayed exempt.
Maryland, my Maryland.

Thou gave the world the great Babe Ruth
Maryland, my Maryland
(Not to mention John Wilkes Booth)
Maryland, my Maryland

But thy greatest hero we salute
A gov named Spiro — what a hoot —
He stuffed his pants with wads of loot,
Maryland, my Maryland.

Thy landscapes are of mixed motifs
Maryland, my Maryland
Tho’ most of them have cloverleafs
Maryland, my Maryland

Thy chicken farms, near every day
Send chicken poop from brook to Bay
‘Tis why thy crabs now taste that way,
Maryland, my Maryland.

Like Ireland, which has no snakes
Maryland, my Maryland,
Thou art the state that has no lakes
Maryland, my Maryland

There is one way that first you rate
Income’s highest in your state
So you’re the one the rest can hate,
Maryland, my Maryland.

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