Summer in Annapolis always has the town packed to the brim with visitors. Especially with the recent storm, record high temperatures and elongated power outages, most people have felt the need to get out, or rather, get “in”, to an air conditioned restaurant. Let me be the first to remind you though, that even though you are cranky and miserable because of the weather, check your attitude at the door. For some reason everyone and their mother finds it necessary to treat the service industry staff like crap when they’re having a bad day. Just from a personal observation, I would never treat anyone poorly who is handling my food and/or beverages. Just saying…

On that note, I recently worked the Fourth of July, like I have for many years, and it’s always a toss up on how busy we might be. This year was hands down the busiest I have ever been. Most people could walk in to a restaurant and see that they are slammed and understand that it might take a little bit longer than usual to be served. Others decide to show their disdain in the form of crappy tips. I understand that if I do a poor job in serving you, I deserve a poor tip. However, if my establishment goes out of its way to seat your party of seven in a section that normally isn’t open during the day, you get decent service given how busy we are, you ask for the check to be split five ways and you didn’t have one complaint (at least that you voiced), and you tip me less than 10%? That makes you and, all of your friends, terrible people who will probably go to a hell where you are forced to wait on douche bags just like yourselves all day long.

Maybe I need to run a refresher course again on tipping etiquette. As a server, I want to know if I’m doing something wrong. I also want to know when I’m doing a great job. Being passive aggressive and leaving me a terrible tip just makes me angry, and don’t think I won’t remember you the next time you come in. If you thought my service was bad the first time, I’ll definitely be sure to show you what 10% service looks like the next time you come in. This evening I had a couple come in, order some drinks and an appetizer and they proceeded to sit for hours. I have no problem if you want to camp out at a table, especially if we’re slow, but there are definitely rules to camping.

1. Don’t camp at a table with four seats if there is only one of you
2. If the restaurant starts to get really busy, think about finishing up so that they can use your table for other customers
3. Try to order something at least every hour to let your server know that you’re not just a squatter
4. TIP MORE THAN USUAL

This particular couple received outstanding service and didn’t want for anything. I got a 10% tip. Really guys, really? You know what 10% says about you? “I’m a cheap SOB who has no regard for how hard you are working.”

My restaurant offers free wifi so it’s not uncommon for a customer to sit for hours doing work. Again, not a problem if we’re not too busy. Restaurants offer wifi so that customers will come in and spend money on things like coffee and sandwiches, but remember–you are basically renting that table for the day so leaving fifty cents for the one bottomless cup of coffee you drank is not a good way to make friends with the wait staff. I’ve said this before and I will say it again… I make $3.63 an hour and most, if not all of that, goes toward taxes. My paychecks are for $0. All of my money comes in the form of tips. I am good at my job and that’s why I am in this field. What I don’t appreciate are people who don’t understand that by tipping 10% for no reason other than the fact that they can, are preventing hard working people all over the country from making an honest living.

After speaking with a friend of mine who works the happy hour shift at a local bar, I also feel the need to remind my fellow readers on how to tip on a discounted check. Just because the bar offers a 50% discount on food and drinks, your servers and bartenders are still working just as hard, if not harder, than they would if everything was full price. So when you get your bill at the end of the day and you’ve ordered $100 worth of food for $50, TIP YOUR SERVER ON THE ORIGINAL AMOUNT.

Ah, it feels good to vent sometimes.

I worked for one of the new restaurant/bars downtown and it just reinforced the fact that not everyone is cut out to own a restaurant, especially if you have no previous experience in the field. I will always applaud an entrepreneur, but most of the people that have experience will probably tell you its way too much work and very little reward.

Restaurant owners come in all shapes and sizes. I’ve worked for owners who have built an empire for the past 70 years and now spend their time traveling with their kids and grand kids. I’ve worked for the struggling, but very involved owner who barely scrapes by but somehow finds a way to keep on chugging. I’ve also worked for owners who are never around and probably can only name a third of their employees’ names, as well as the employer who is so ego-centric and arrogant that he thinks the world revolves around him and cares more about his employees knowing his accolades than knowing their names. The last kind of owner is the worst, and maybe because I just came from an environment with an oppressive boss, I can speak volumes about “this guy”. Nothing is ever good enough and no matter how many hours you put in or how dedicated you are, you will never be appreciated. Businesses that are run like that will never survive.

One of my co-workers said to me one night, (and I wish I could take credit for it) “Opening a bar is the new over priced sports cars for men with mid-life crises.” In our case, it could not have been any more true. I mean, I love pineapples but you don’t see me moving  to Hawaii to compete with the Dole Plantation, do you?

My favorite story about one owner I worked for was his take on his personal alcohol policy. He told me one night when the restaurant first opened that he would never get drunk at his own bar. He never wanted his customers or staff to ever see him in that light. Respectable, right? But every single night after that comment was made, the guy never was without a glass in his hands. The bar would be packed, standing room only, and he would be sitting on a bar stool. Rule #1 in owning a bar: let your paying customers have your seat. Rule #2: put your glass down and see what you can do to help your employees. One night after drinking way too much, “this guy” got so hammered he blacked out. He had no recollection of grabbing the flag from out front and sprinting through the busy restaurant waving it around like he was on the Raven’s flag squad. Watching that clip over and over again on the surveillance cameras and showing all my coworkers was hands down the most rewarding part of that job.

My advice to restaurant owners–as an employee, treat people as you’d want to be treated, it’s the golden rule. Don’t be hypocritical and don’t act so high and mighty. Humble yourselves a bit and it will do wonders for your business. Always remember: Karma is a bitch, and so am I.

With the new boom of item specific bars and restaurants ie. micro breweries, wine bars, rum bars, tequila bars, whiskey bars, ethnic restaurants etc., it opens up a lot of room for criticism from our fellow bloggers. Not every employee at a whiskey bar is going to be a whiskey master, the same way as not every employee at a wine bar is going to be a sommelier. If that was the case, these establishments would go out of business before they even opened their doors because not many employers can afford the high price of expertise. Typically there will be at least one person on hand who has the knowledge to train the rest of the staff; and they’re generally the owner or the buyer. And most of the time, those two are one in the same. As a typical consumer, I would expect the staff at an item specific establishment to know the basics about each product, but would not quiz them endlessly about the distillation or fermentation processes of a particular spirit. These types of questions are likely only able to be answered by the producer themselves. I recently saw a gentleman smell the glassware of a new establishment, mumbling to his “buddy” about coconut oil used in the dish washing process and how it hinders the nose on his pinot noir. Really? I came to find out he is one of those dreadful bloggers I mentioned above. If you are reading this, Mr. Know It All, no one cares about your bar and restaurant reviews. The fact that you can’t hold down a job (and probably a girlfriend for that matter) makes your opinion pointless and obsolete. If you know of a hundred ways to properly run a restaurant, then why aren’t you operating one yourself?

I’ve been in the industry long enough to know how difficult it is to run a restaurant or bar; and my kudos go out to all of those restauranteurs who are going out of their way to provide great food, good atmosphere and a friendly staff. It is not an easy task. Please don’t be distraught or dismayed by reviews you may be reading by people hiding behind their computers who are too afraid to come to you in person and tell you how they really feel about your business.

Please look for me on Facebook “The Bar B*tch” and on Twitter @TheBarBiotch. Happy Blogging :)

Imagine a bustling Saturday night, people crammed into our small waiting area by the door looking at about an hour wait for a table. There are lit votive candles on every table and several surrounding the waiting area. Out of no where the over-powering scent of burnt hair wafts through the restaurant. This was closely followed by whispers and a whole bunch of “oh, nah uh” s. Once it was established that everyone was okay, we offered the hair-burnt woman a drink on us. Mind you, every restaurant is visited by the fire marshal on a very regular basis and there are strict rules about candles and their height in relation to the holders they are contained in. Well, one drink apparently was not enough; all of her friends were furious and demanded that they all deserve a free drink because of their friend’s misfortune. To avoid causing a scene, we comped a whole round of drinks for these ladies. As if that was not enough, once they were seated, they harassed their server, gave her zero respect and left her a terrible tip.

I have come to the realization that people will milk situations as much as possible to try to save a few bucks, even if those few dollars would have been a server or bartender’s tip.

Just this past weekend, a table of two women sat outside, engaged in a serious conversation the whole evening. They did not pay any attention to their server when she would stop by to see how they were doing. Upon their departure, they mentioned to another employee that their service was terrible and they refused to leave a tip. I hope that extra five dollars you saved was really worth it. You know your server took a mental picture of your face and if you ever dare to grace us with your presence again, you will actually find out what bad service is all about.

My tip of the day to all of you reading out there: If you can’t afford at least a 15% tip, then don’t dine out. And if you are carrying five extra pounds of fake hair on the back of your head, make sure to avoid any open flames.

At dinner this evening, a co-worker approached me about a questionable couple seated close to the bar, trying to order alcoholic beverages. He explained that he wasn’t comfortable serving them because, when he asked for ID, they both had vertical Virginia licenses. When he explained that he couldn’t accept the IDs, they started to get huffy. I was standing at the bar listening and decided to chime in. “I am so sorry, but it is our policy not to accept any form of vertical identification”. They tried to argue that in Virginia you were not allowed to get a horizontal ID until your license expired. False, it is your choice whether or not to get a new ID, and if I was residing in Virginia, I wouldn’t rush to get it changed but knowing that most Maryland establishments have adopted the policy of refusing any and all forms of vertical IDs, I would do my damnedest to get a replacement ASAP.

When I tried to explain that most places in Maryland will not accept vertical driver’s licenses and asked if they had another form of ID, the lady handed me her military ID.  At this point I’m thinking to myself “Why didn’t you just give me this in the first place, Einstein?”. I’ve seen plenty of military IDs in my years working in Annapolis and when I flipped the card over to check the birth date, it was conveniently covered up or “misprinted”, as I was informed, and the date wasn’t even legible except for “9N”. OK, so now I’ve seen two forms of ID, one vertical and established as unacceptable, and another with the birth date blocked out. Most customers probably would have accepted their fate and decided that that one glass of wine maybe just wasn’t worth it, but nooooo, in walk Mom and Dad to join the young couple. Once hearing their daughter pout and complain because she can’t have a glass of wine, the mother corners me in the back and interrogates me. After I go through my conversation again, mother looks at me and says “those two are most likely going to Afghanistan next year and you’re going to deny them a drink?”  I don’t care if you’re the Queen of England, I’m not going to risk my job or my liquor license taking a risk on serving potential minors.

It only got worse from there….now it was Dad’s turn, How dare I refuse daddy’s little girl. He tried all of these:

• “Oh you’re the manager, I’m sure you can let it slide”
• “so if you can read the number 9 on her military ID card than that must mean she was born in 1989”
• “I’m not a cop and no one is going to say anything”

These were just three of the responses I got out of daddy dearest. I tried to politely tell him that we could get fined, or lose our liquor license. I told him that I would lose my job; and, if it were me personally and I had a “misprinted” military ID, I would get a new card, carry around a passport or get my license changed to a universally acceptable horizontal format.

The family stormed out demanding my name and threatening to call the owner. Well that’s an awkward conversation “I’m angry because one of your employees refused to serve my daughter alcohol because she didn’t have proper identification.” Let me know how that one goes!

After doing a little research of my own, thanks to Google, texting a former bartender friend of mine, and swinging past my local watering hole to speak with the “head of security”, all assured me that vertical ID’s were universally unaccepted in Maryland. My bouncer friend said that the only catch to this clause would be if the person in question had a military ID. Explaining the situation with the unreadable date of birth, everyone around unanimously agreed that “the bitch was crazy”.

So for all of you under-agers or barely-legals out there, think twice before you mess with the hand of the (restaurant) law. Any bartender or server can refuse to sell you alcohol without any reason what-so-ever, and many establishments have their own policies that they follow regarding the sale and consumption of alcohol. I have sat through many pain-stakingly boring seminars highlighting the dangers of alcohol, and believe me when I say that consuming alcoholic beverages was the last thing that this family should EVER be doing.

Also, one last piece of advice that we can thank a close dear friend of mine for:

If you are trying to obtain a fake ID, please do not spend $90 over-nighting an envelope of $200 cash to China. Not only are they going to laugh at you, so will all of your friends. Love you, K  :)

When the bill arrived they asked for separate checks (ughh) and the single gentleman paid his portion and asked me to validate his parking pass. I told him that, unfortunately, we do not validate parking. Now mind you, we have never validated parking, there are no signs in the restaurant stating that we validate parking and there is no reference at all to validation on our menus or our website. This seemed to greatly anger the customer and he proceeded to explain to me that “on Yelp! it says that you validate”.

Yelp!, as far as I’m concerned, is an informative website designed to review restaurants and such. The restaurants themselves do not have anything to do with Yelp! or the reviews they are given. When I tried to explain to the man that someone must have been misinformed when they wrote that review, he wasn’t having any of it. I asked him if he consulted our  website–“No”. Or if he called the restaurant prior to his trip– “No”. So I assured him that we were not responsible for the misinformation that he received.

He would not stop berating me about how absurd it was that no one from my company went onto the Yelp! website and corrected that horrid mistake. I assured him I would alert the owners and make them aware. I then asked him how his meal and service was and he said it was all excellent, but he still couldn’t believe he had to pay to get out of the parking garage (as all you Annapolitans know, it’s a whopping $2 or $4). They left and, as I should have expected, he left me less than 10%. Really? Your service and food were great and because you were misinformed by a nobody on some random website you’re going to tip ME less? I don’t know who I felt more sorry for, the embarrassed couple sitting across from him or the man himself. No wonder he was dining solo.

Nothing says “Happy Holidays” like a 10% tip.

Here are some of my suggestions: meet your friends or family for coffee and walk around beautiful downtown Annapolis, cook at home, don’t order that second cocktail if it’s going to be a strain on your wallet, or pre-game before you go to the bar.

On the other hand, every now and again we get customers, usually regulars, who want to spread the Christmas cheer and over-tip their servers. To you I say “thank you”. We know you don’t have to, and we appreciate it ever-so-much. Business is very up and down for us in December and January and every little bit helps.

I’m looking forward to the reprieve from work and spending time with my wonderful family in sunny Florida. So to all of you out there, Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays and wishing you the greatest of New Years from the Bar Bitch!

Typically in the aforementioned situation I would absolutely say something OR I would take the change back and let them figure it out. This particular table however specifically stated that they did not need any change. I chalked it up to dumb luck, or karma as I like to think, and went on with my work.

Now let’s reverse the scenario. At my establishment we, as servers, are responsible for making all of our own drinks, alcoholic or not. Sometimes when it gets busy we may rely on the help of a fellow co-worker to make a drink if we are “in the weeds”. Occasionally we may forget to charge a table for that cocktail, beer or soda. As a customer, would you tell your server it’s not on the bill, or would you just assume it was your lucky day, pay your tab, and be off as quick as a prom dress? No one has a problem telling their server when they are accidentally over-charged for something or didn’t realize curly fries were a dollar extra, but I’m curious if those same people would speak up when the odds were in their favor.

This past Saturday nearly 4000 Annapolitans donned their sunscreen and dancing feet and headed over to the Anne Arundel County Fairgrounds for the first annual Annapalooza Music and Arts Festival. Given a slight reprieve from the ghastly temperatures we’ve had this summer, Saturday proved to be a beautiful day.

The fairground location was ideal; set up with three stages, a strip of fabulous vendors, great food and plenty of shade to hide out in if the sun got to be too hot. The Absolut Alley Stage, perched at the top of the grounds,  played host to some great local bands such as Higher Hands (a personal favorite), Sweet Leda, Dean Rosenthal and Pressing Strings–although acoustically was a bit of a nightmare. Many local area restaurants also called Absolut Alley their home for the day serving up some great mixed drinks. The Grapefruit Crushes from Sam’s on the Waterfront were not to be missed!

Stage 2, The Woodchuck Hard Cider Stage, sat next to Absolut Alley with the perfect mix of shade and acoustics (as well as being directly next to the “food court”). I spent most of my time here listening to some great bands like The Bridge, Grilled Lincolns and Mambo Sauce and during set breaks we were entertained by a BMX high jumper.

The Main stage allowed plenty of room to spread out with blankets and lawn chairs and enjoy the “Summer of Rock” winners; Synesthesia, High-brid and Have Gun Won’t Travel. Also featured on here were Afro Bop Alliance, The Cheaters, Bill Kirchen, Pietasters and headliners, Soja.

For a music and arts festival, I would have liked to have seen more “arts”. Besides the vendors, there was a definite lack of any substantial art. I spoke with a would-be vendor, and it seemed like the creators of Annapalooza made it very difficult for local artists to attain booth space–maybe something to consider for next year. Besides being an incredibly musically oriented town, Annapolis has such a wealth of amazing artists that I was hoping to see at the festival. I left a bit disappointed in that aspect. There was a huge focus on recycling, which I have to applaud, and I think they did an excellent job organizing and running the venue.

Laura Atkinson and Stephanie Wantland, festival volunteers, said they were excited to have such a great venue to showcase some of the local talent that Annapolis has to offer. They also stressed that there was some concern with the festival corresponding with the opening day of the Renaissance Festival, but were happy with the turnout they had received. “We’re all really looking forward to doing it again next year” Atkinson stated.

I worked at Phillips down in OC, hon, for two summers and you really had to bite your tongue sometimes. I’ll never forget when a head server, having a bad day, received a thirty-five cent tip. She followed the customers outside, handed them their thirty-five cents back and said “Here, take this. Apparently you need this more than I do.” She was suspended for a few days, but I’m sure it felt so good.

I used to manage a snowball stand in Baltimore County when I was in high school and I think it was then that I realized that it doesn’t matter where you are or what you do, some people just like to complain. There was a woman who would come to the stand several times a week with her daughter and there was always something wrong with her snowball. One day I snapped. She ordered a rainbow snowball, being very artistic, it’s one of my favorites to make, and as I handed it to her she says “There’s not enough flavor on it. It’s all dry at the bottom.” I told her I could add more syrup but it would only make it over-saturated. She said “I don’t want your opinion, I want more flavor.” So I add more flavor until she tells me to stop. She hands off the snowball to her daughter and they have a seat at one of the picnic tables. Not even five minutes later, the woman approaches the stand with the snowball and starts bitching about how it’s all syrup and she wants a new one. I respond with “Um, yeah. I told you it was fine the first time but you insisted on adding more flavor. I have been working here for four years, I think I know the correct proportions at this point.” She demands to speak to my manager. “I am the manager!” I knew I should’ve just held my tongue and given her a new one, but it was so rewarding to see her face when I said that to her.

I know there are some great stories out there… anyone ever get fired for telling someone off? What’s the most impulsive thing you’ve ever said to a table? Have you ever had a server sass you or say anything inappropriate?

And speaking of potentially inappropriate, during my stint at Phillips, I decided to try a new approach to see if I could increase my tip percentage. Two gentlemen were seated in my section, they’re laughing, having a good time. They ask “Do you have crabs?” My response, very straight-faced, “That seems like a very personal question.” I suddenly realized my attempt at humor was lost on them. It was the longest ten seconds of my life…until they burst out laughing. Close one.

Finally, Springs thought of the day: (this one on MySpace)

Chit-Chatting With Server: Most people want to order their food and receive it in a TIMELY MANNER, NOT to make a friend. I don’t like it when a server starts a conversation with me INSTEAD of just taking my order. I came there to EAT AND DRINK and socialize with the person or people that I am with, NOT the wait staff.

Some customers are actually decent human beings and treat others with respect. I doubt your server will pull up a chair and have an hour long conversation with you about religion or politics, so try to be polite. It will make your dining experience much more enjoyable.