The Rule: Bros Before Hoes

Hey Chanel–

What do I do? A long time good friend of mine is now stuck so far up  some girl’s $#%& that he and I don’t ever do anything.  I understand about girls and all that, but we have been friends for a while and now it seems like he is tossing that all out the window. What’s so important about that chick that you can’t keep/make plans anymore?  Oh, I am male and so is by buddy–duh!

Let me shed a little insight. For the most part, guys feel obligated to spend a lot of time with a new relationship. At the beginning – you may rarely see or hear from your guy friend. I’ll agree, that does suck. Instead of getting on your friend’s case – maybe try to understand what is happening.

Has it been a while since they’ve had a special someone to be intimate and personal with? Or, does he seem insanely happy since they’ve started to date? If so, then obviously it’s a positive change. If not, where is it going? Is she a bit controlling? Does she limit his ‘guy time?’  Does she get mad if she isn’t invited to everything and anything he does?  If so – then, yes, step in!

Overall – jealously will overcome the best of us. It’s hard to watch someone we’ve been close with suddenly be preoccupied with someone cute, cuddly and time consuming. But, why not step back and realize – maybe there’s been a time you’ve been with someone and you didn’t make the right amount of time for your friends or family. Not you? That could be the other issue – maybe you are jealous that you are alone and they get to be happy with a female (the blowup doll doesn’t compare- huh?)

All in all – be honest with your friend. If you act hostile – expect that in return. More than likely your friend does not even realize he is making you feel the way you are and will fix it. That is, if you approach it in a mature friendly manner. No one wants to be made to feel like the bad guy or to put down something that is making him happy.

If this girl really is bad news – give the insight early. Have you seen the movie Valentine’s Day? Ashton Kutcher’s character was completely heartbroken at the end; and everyone around him disapproved of the girl he proposed to [miss hotness herself, Jessica Alba] and yet no one told him.

Don’t be that guy – be a friend.

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Category: OPINION

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A short and witty young professional with tons of advice for you to grasp onto. I can cover anything from relationships to small business management to modeling to photography to career changes to having babies. Bring it on!