Did That Waitress Just Flirt With Me?

| April 6, 2010
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Doubtful!

I met this guy a while back who admitted to recognizing me from my restaurant. He said “Don’t you remember me? I was there with a big birthday party and I sat at the end of the table? You were our waitress and you couldn’t stop flirting with me”.

Granted, I do remember a lot of people; but I had never seen this guy before in my life. Obviously, he was very impressionable. I asked him what seductive moves I threw at him that night to get him so hot and bothered. “Was it the classic shoulder lean in?” “No.” “Was it the witty banter?” “No.” “Then it must’ve been the eyebrow move.” “No.”

So at this point I was totally confused. Those are my signature moves, especially the eyebrow. No one can resist nor forget the eyebrow move. My curiosity had gotten the better of me and finally I asked “What was it then?” and he said “You kept smiling and asking me if I needed anything.”

Seriously? These are the kind of people I have to deal with on a daily basis. Honey, it is MY JOB to smile and make sure you are happy and have everything you need. My livelihood depends on it.  Just because I smile at you, it does not mean that I want to have ten of your babies. If I was flirting with you, you would know it. Subtlety is not a word in my flirting dictionary.

That reminds me of a few years ago when I was working in Eastport.  I had just been given a new table, went to greet them, and recognized them as regulars. We chatted a bit– it’s always nice to make your regulars feel important. I got their drinks and took their order. I was walking out of the kitchen when the husband approached me and grabbed my arm. He slipped me his card, a five dollar bill, and whispered in my ear for me to call him.

Eww, even thinking about it gives me the creeps. If you actually think you may have a chance of scoring with your server you must

  • a.) not be married
  • b.) not approach your server when your wife is sitting twenty feet away and
  • c.) you better slip me a lot more than five bucks.

The same guy actually stalked me a bit when I switched jobs. He started showing up a few times a week, sans wife of course, and would sit at the bar and order shots of tequila. Nothing impresses the ladies more than an unattractive, overweight, middle-aged man taking shots of tequila while he waits to take his carry-out home to his wife and kids. It was so bad one night that some concerned customers offered to be my parents just to scare him away. Thanks guys, I owe you one.

As a lesson to all you lonely, conceited men and women out there: if your server or bartender smiles at you and makes a point to seem genuinely interested in your meal/drink/conversation, they don’t want your body, they’re probably just doing their job.

I’m curious, anyone have any good stories about getting hit on at work?

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Category: COLUMNS, Just For Fun, LIFE IN THE AREA, OPINION, Rant, The Bar Bitch

About the Author ()

I graduated with an Art degree from a small liberal arts college, did a bit of traveling and moved to Annapolis from Baltimore about seven years ago. I currently manage a well-known Annapolis restaurant, serve and bartend. I live downtown and I like sunsets and long walks on the beach :)
  • running with scissors

    “You kept smiling and asking me if I needed anything.”

    Whew, thank god you explained you were just doing your job, or I was going to have to kick our waiter’s butt at a restaurant we have gone to for 20 years. Because if he would have been flirting all that time, he would have been hitting on my father and my mother, my aunt and uncle, me and my wife and my children when they were kids and now as young adults.

    Thanks for the clarity, you saved one of your own from a butt whippin.

    Funny stuff, thanks for the laugh.

  • Fred Shubbie

    You have to wonder about a guy that would hit on a waitress. The object of his desire works for tips, has no health benefits, 3 roommates, and goes home smelling like the strongest smell in the kitchen –seafood or garlic, the smokey-fat smell of a steakhouse….

  • The Bar Bitch

    You have to wonder about a guy that would spend all of his time commenting on opinion columns and blogs. He obviously must not get out much.

    I, sir, know my fair share of people in Annapolis as well, and not one of them has ever judged me based on my choice of profession. What do you do for a living that makes YOU so high and mighty?

    Fortunately for you, I don’t date shallow, gold-digging men. Thank you for reminding us that ignorance comes in all shapes and sizes.

  • fred shubbie®

    Why do you need to know my profession , do you want to judge me. I judge you because you are a 30 year old who works in the service industry and uses this forum to judge your customers–you know, the people who write your paycheck. You work for them sweety. I decide how much you get paid . I am the judge.

  • The Bar Bitch

    HAHAHA you are a funny one! Last time I looked at my paycheck, your name was not on it. It was also for $30, so if you are my boss, you are extremely cheap. Waiters and waitresses more or less work a commission based sales job. If you have a problem tipping them based on their age, class, gender or education, then you should not eat out. Ever.

    I use this forum to pass on funny information about things certain customers do while drinking and dining. I have never generalized or stereotyped as you do, my friend. Deep seeded insecurity at its finest, ladies and gentlemen.

  • http://fark.com Captain Dudeman

    If you got a 30 dollar paycheck waiting tables then you are probably bad at it. Just sayin’.

  • The Bar Bitch

    Hey genius, do you know what servers make an hour? A whopping $3.63 an hour. Most of that gets taken out for taxes and NONE of that reflects our performance, thank you very much.

  • msclutch

    Everyone should be required to work in a food-based service job at one point or another. They’d be more respectful, less ignorant, and probably tip better because they’d realize that most of the time, the only check you get from your employer says “This is not a check” and you are almost entirely reliant on the tips you make.

    I don’t understand the ignorance that “Your server must not be college educated or must be a loser because they are serving.” Sometimes serving is a job that people take to get them through college, sometimes serving is something people do because the economy sucks and they’d rather not take unemployment, and sometimes (shocker) it’s a career choice because people like being social and interacting with others in that way and they hate office jobs. I have friends who serve or bartend who have masters degrees and used to work for Fortune 500 companies, but ultimately decided the office life wasn’t for them.

    I graduated from college and have a full-time day job but waitress on weekends for extra cash and also because I enjoy the environment much more than the office. The next time you go to a restaurant, you should respect your waiter as another human being instead of thinking them below you in status or intelligence.

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  • Josiah_maglott

    How about if a girl waitress not more then 20ish looking overflows your water glass TWICE at separate intervals and offers to run back to the kitchen and get you a new one? Is she flirting?